Looming over the edge, pondering the things I didn't do, staring into the nothingness.
Kissing beautiful strangers with full, sensuous lips, volunteering in a poverty stricken country, getting married and doing the whole white picket fence thing...blah blah blah....
The hardness of the slabs of gray slate beneath my feet, its cold piercing through the bottom of my shoes. The very edge, blossoming with purple majesty violets and the intoxicating lure of the lilacs calm me as I look over the edge yet again, unafraid and unaware of what I will feel when I jump.
This is it. I am finally going to be free. I know hurt, disappointment, fear and pain like next door neighbors with thin walls, but nothing has prepared me for this moment with my feet hanging on the very edge.
I breathe in air; concentrating, calming, allowing freedom to be so close to me. I wouldn't be here if I didn't want it so bad. The "IT" that manifests itself deep within like a beautiful violet fighting its way out between the cracks.
To be continued.....
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